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Fuck you technology, you sad lonely fuck

I hate technology for what it has done to social interaction.

I hate every moment when their eyes are fixed on the screen instead of my face at every conversation

we have. TVs, smartphones, and computers own their undivided attention.

No, I am not flattered at how you pretend to listen to me and answer me back with ummss and aahhhhs and uhhuhhhs.

No, I find it condescending how you think that that is enough to make me go on while you would have a few more minutes to look at your screen in between your ummss and aahhhhs and uhhuhhhs.

I resent the very core of my soul for taking computer science for I feel as though I am condoning, approving and encouraging these technologies to continue to ruin my social life.

I learn

to program what would be distractions to all mankind. I learn

about the hardware that would hold their very souls, trapping them in together with the software that are no more than virtual. I learn

to design a masterpiece of human interaction destroyer for they shall never again face another human being and look them in the eye and talk.

I resent that I would go on for days on end with a room full of friends and never have a conversation or eye contact.

I hate the inventors of these technology that have revolutionised how people interact and left me behind in the past.

I despise how the addiction of these drugs called technology has become an epidemic, a plague that has infected everyone except me.

Most of all, I’m jealous that I am not as good a friend as a screen would be to them.

I miss talking to people, and hearing people talking to me.

I miss how they would look into my eyes as I talk as though they are hearing, listening to what I said and respond more than just ummss and aahhhhs and uhhuhhhs.

I miss listening to sound opinions coming out of their mouths instead of reading them as posts on their social media.

I miss laughter that came after the punchline of a joke and not after the playing of a gif or post of a picture.

I miss my friends.

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Friends konon nya tek nak

The things one must do to satisfy a friend. One must be witty enough to entertain them, be intelligent enough to entertain them and be useful enough to not bore them of our presence. Even then, is it even enough? Fuck the people who make their friends feel worthless. 

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Justice and Moral Grey Areas

We live in a world where villains are not villains and heroes are not heroes. Our world is not either black or white. It isn’t definitive. Moral grey areas exist where we can’t seem to judge right from wrong. Thus, we question ourselves if such an idea even exist. And with that, we question justice, as the definition of justice is so different in different eyes. But then again, who are we to become judge, jury and persecutor. Who are we but anarchist of a revolution as every idea is a revolution from its predecessor.

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Student Loan

You wanna know what I think about student loans?

It’s the government’s effort to ensure that lack of funding would not be an issue for students who wish to continue their studies in tertiary education.

Now, you wanna know what I think about people complaining about student loans?

It’s just a bunch of spoilt little kids who don’t understand the value of money when they have it in their hands and blaming the government for their lack of thriftiness. 

Seriously, if you are given twenty fucking thousand on your education, don’t spend 80% of it to buy your smartphone or your Ipod or any other expensive shit that has nothing to do with your education. It is possible to use the money given to you by the loan to pay for the loan. The idea of having money to spend money just because you can is stupid because the money is not yours in the first place. It was given to you by the government to pursue your education, not to buy your fancy gizmo shit just so that you have something to play with. If you haven’t earned any money independently yet, my advice to you is to not spend the money you don’t own.

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Penjara Bawah Tanah dan Naga

Wouldn’t it be cool if Dungeons and Dragons were played in Bahasa Melayu Tradisional. For example, patik and tuan hamba to refer to oneself and the other person respectively. Would be a nice refreshing way to play while preserving the language.

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My Autobiography

You can’t really write an honest book about yourself if your mother is still alive. You have to wait until she pass away before you could write a good autobiography. If I were to write one now, it’s not a book, it’s a pamphlet.

p.s By the way, I’m not being narcissistic by saying I should write one, but a friend mentioned I should write one someday and if I ever did, it would be very interesting. It reminded me of something a comedian said in a podcast which was somewhere along the lines of the above statement.

p.p.s Why the fuck is the explanation longer than the actual statement? Bodoh eh.. 

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In a conflict, at times you can’t help but choose a side which you feel is morally suited to you. But what disturbs me is the influences that made you choose. You can even hear arguments on both sides and still the possibility of choosing the wrong side is there since we are also easily influenced by what we see and hear. For example, the innocent could have been a bad debater who incidentally made them sound like they were the bad ones.. For example of course.

Arguably, there might not even be a good side and a bad side. It’s merely a fantasy we have from childhood that a good side and a bad side exist. The reality is that there would not even have a conflict in the first place if the both sides did not start it by doing their own “fair share” of sins and dirty deeds. People underestimate how much a simple action can accolade and cause moral conflict. And when this happens in both sides, they romanticise the idea that they are the martyr while the other is the spawn of satan. This idea will then wipe of any trace of guilt that they may have left and begin to attack the other. When both sides do this, well, imagine the damage it could cause. Just simply imagine. 

Of course, it is impossible to remain neutral in a conflict like this. To remain neutral means that we allow both sides to destroy one another. So, instinctively we pick a side. This way, we could make an effort to only let one side be destroyed. So, there is no sitting on the fence with this one.

But all that is just bullshit because if people don’t lose touch with what humanity is, a sense of consideration should somehow be there deep inside their soul as God have implanted in their very DNA. Humanity is what makes us a “chosen” race. We lose that, then we lose everything.